my new (townie) life

I have not posted a blog in sooooo long and I think enough has happened in my life to blog about. I haven't openly admitted it to everyone that it really effects, my friends in the dallas area, but I have moved back to Burnet and I am going to ACC for the remainder of the school year. I drive every morning to school and enjoy the sunrise on my "long" drive to educate myself. I'm taking 15 hours this semester which is alot better than my 19 I took at UNT, however I accidentally signed up for General Chemistry(the class after intro) instead of Intro to Chem. and am struggling in understanding what exactly is going on, but I was too proud to drop the class and I am now stuck in it but it will get better I am sure. I am transfering to Concordia in the Fall 08 or I at least plan to, I might do more at ACC just because transfering is not really easy to do or to keep track of.
IN OTHER NEWS:
I have found a new love for the two taco deal at Jack in the Box, the meat in them is orange and surprisingly tasty...and they are 99 cents for two.
I have made new friends with all the members of a band called Arch Bishop, who currently reside in Brady, TX. I don't know how I get along with them but I do they remind me of my friends to some extent and its interesting to me to see them interact with each other.
I spend about 20% of my day in a land called Keygla(I named it) where I am a mere prince who shares land with a princess(Katie) and we bow to a king(Jacob) and all three of us bow to a empress(Alisha) and her newly acquired emperor(Saw or Samer).
I am still playing harmonica and got a keyboard for Christmas and I have been playing both very frequently.
I got poison ivy really bad on my face the other day when I was in Austin because I ran into some woods I was certain had a dead body inside them...no body...just poison ivy.
I went bike riding for the first time in a long time and it felt so good with this nice weather in Febuarary.
Also I was in a pretty major car wreck with Katie while she was driving and we spun off the road and into a barbed wire fence, both of us walked out of it alive and scratch free (her car however was not so futunate), God had definatly blessed us.

Oh I found out today that Ben is going to the Opera or Ballet (I don't remember exactly) but I assumed he was taking emily, his girlfriend, because it is Valentine's weekend and all....NO he is taking Jeff W.....totally did not see that one coming.

that is all I can really say....I'm a townie but only because I want to be!

pipe dreams

So if you read my other blog it talks about the poem reading that happened on saturday, well Korey my brother thinks it was really good and I don't know what to really do with what he is putting out there for me. He has offered to record me and make me a myspace page with some of my poems on it. It sounds great but I don't want people to think that I am trying to become some successful poet (it would be cool) but it is not my dream. I don't feel like I am good enough to make it in that industry especially when Bradley Hathaway has done basically everything I am about to do. I am not Bradley Hathaway and I am not trying to be. I enjoy reading my poetry to open ears and the more people know about me the more people I can read to. I don't have dreams of becoming this amazing poet with a book and a cd, I am just a kid trying to entertain myself and do something I enjoy. I know that many people will view my plans as a entreprenurial effort to become a great and famous person, that is not my intention. I am not looking for glory or to even make something out of my writings. I am just doing something I enjoy and I am not trying to steal anyone's thunder or put the lime light on me. I know many people will see it that way but hopefully the people that matter and care about me will still see me as I am and not as some get rich quick poetry loser trying to copy something that has already been done.
thank you again to everyone who listened to my poetry I enjoyed it and thank you for anyone willing to give me advice on this subject aka sara and mitch.

my first poetry reading

this past Saturday, I was invited by my brothers in a band called Exploring the Sky by Day to read poetry before they played and I did.
I read seven poems that I wrote. I was really nervous just because poetry is more of a mature kind of thing where as rock music is a sporatic art. (I'm not saying my poetry is art) So I was worried about how people would reacte to my poetry and luckily everyone seemed to enjoy it. Once I started reading I realized that I was going to be ok and that I have been on stage before. I read and everyone laughed at the right parts and seemed to enjoy it.
After I was done I was greeted with, "Josh that was so good." and "Josh, I loved it." which was good because I've always been kind of had a doubt that my writing isnt very good. so everyone seemed to like and it and I was invited to read again before Exploring the Sky by Day. So it was great and my best friend Jordan said he loved it and that was the best part because he doesnt say he loves anything unless he really does.
Thank you all of the Burnet kids for that experience
Thank you poetry night for teaching me how to read poetry properly and to write well.

new experiences I suppose

This is the update on myself, here is some of the stuff my life contains.
I still dont know if the Great Pumpkin is good or bad.
Being out on the lake with Ben, Cory, and Abe is always the funnest time. I dont know why its always good with them but it is.
I like to film with my little dinky camera way to much.
I have finally let go of trying to make my future the best one possible. I am just putting it in God's hands now.
I have realized I have never been in love with a girl. I also have never had a broken heart.
I write way more than I used to.
I go to Kay's and Zales and pretend like I am buying a ring for a girl and I am going to propose to her...I dont even have a girlfriend, I just think its funny to listen to the girls that work at the stores.
I understand Mitch's blogs and his 'about me' now.
I take walks in the park almost everyday and I don't stop walking until I have put my ipod on a band and listened a whole cd of theirs.
When I see a girl and I think she is pretty I walk up to her and say "You're very pretty." I say it sincerely too and then I just keep on my way.
I want to learn to play harmonica really bad.
I explored these woods behind Home Depot and their is this creek back there and it has so many frogs(like bullfrogs they are so big) and turtles, and the creek is to shallow for them to run away from me or hide underwater so I chase them and catch them. I put them back after I capture them. No harm done.
I have a big sister and big brother, Sara and Mitch. I have never realized how much I have learned from Sara until now. I just think about how far I have come from when I first met her and now where I am. I have not hung out with Mitch for longer than about 4 hours, and everytime he sees me somehow he is able to mess with my happy little life. I don't question life alot, I don't try to comprehend time and God, I just know what they are or what they want from me, but dang Mitch smashes my happy little life. He makes me look at things and think about things I have never thought about, I get lost and I have no idea how to take the information he has just laid in front of me. So I ask him and he just says that I have figure it out for myself. Then I try to be sneaky and ask Sara what Mitch is talking about but she says the same dang thing. Mitch and Sara you mess with my life so bad just to let you know, but it is a good thing.
I have really good brothers and sisters, Will, Jordan, Korey, Kenan, Ben, Cory, Jacob R., Alisha, and Virginia.
Lightning is still the best part of nature.
I am planning on going on my own mission trip with some friends. I don't like people being in charge of me and telling me where to go so I have decided to start my own. (if you are intrested let me know)
Life is a really good thing.
Finding friends is something I don't have a talent for.
I fear crickets and Hell about the same amount now. I don't know if that is good or bad.
I think that is all that I will reveal for now. Thank you for your time...but time doesn't exist just to let you know. pffft mitch

Mitch and Sara

thank you for all your help throughout this past year, I have learned so much about life, God, relationships, and happiness from you guys, I just wanted to say that I appreciate everything you guys have done for me. You are my second pair of (not old) parents. I just wanted to say thank you for always teaching me something and being great people to me and everyone around you. I only hope that one day I will have someone to relay all the advice you have given me, to.
thanks guys and I am going to try and stick it out here.

leaving?

I have been considering moving down to Austin because it is closer to home. There is some conflict in this decision though. I don't know if I have given Denton, Texas a chance. Sara most likely hated Burnet for the first couple of weeks before she started meeting people. So I don't know if I leave I am leaving for the right reasons. I miss home, but I don't know if I have allowed myself to grow any in Denton. The only people I know well are Sara and Mitch and they are still pretty far away. I am trying to make new friends but everyone seems so busy up here, no one has time to just walk around and just enjoy the day.
Well the that is about my only thing I wanted to say. I might be leaving after this semester to go down to Concordia University in Austin. I hope that God guides me to make the right decision and I just pray that He will help me with this fork in the road. If you have any input or advice on what I should do please let me know.

my first romantic thoughts of my life

this is a poem about my experience with a young lady, and what thoughts went through my head on a Saturday night when I cuddled with her....nothing more than cuddling happened, scouts honor.. I also think thats why it meant more to me than if I would have gotten more physical with this girl.




TIES
Laid my head down, inbetween your shoulderblades
the perfect crevis for my brain to rest and think,
while you laid on your belly and pondered God knows what,
I could feel your spine on my temple,
so warm,
I wondered if you could be my home, my new home,
could you be somewhere I could rest my thoughts and my head forever?
you have the world I want to be apart of
and I have a problem with intimacy,
we were in our own world, before our friends woke to the sun,
but we didn't sleep, not a wink,
we soaked up each other's skin, but no words were spoken,
you laid on your belly and me inbetween your shoulders,
is this where I want to be? I think so,
the way your warm soft flesh on my rough weary face,
we had no where we needed to go except closer,
nothing will replace the way your warm body and my cold heart
mixed to make an interesting temperature,
the world is out to get me, so I wondered
could I warm my insides with your back?
Is your life warm enought to heat up my soul?
you got it, but I can't have it,
did our friends heat each other as you did to me? I hope so,
our bodies were put together,
with you on your belly and me between your shoulderblades
we had to change, but I never wanted to,
I haven't felt the summer heat in September until then
It won't be like this forever, I told myself
with you on your belly and me resting in your shoulders,
I spoke to others as we absorbed each other,
I know it sounds crazy, but your fire
was burning my cold body,
you knew you were hotter than me,
you knew you heated up my lost heart,
you heated up my whole world,
with you on your belly and me inside you...